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petertenthije
09-09-2003, 08:13 PM
Well, the title describes it quite good so I will begin. A story I read on the internet.

Freight driver. (from Drente Courant, 03/12/1996)
A freight train driver that had to wait at Assen regularly had taken the opportunity to walk to the nearby snack bar. This time though he was given the green light while the driver was still waiting at the snack bar. The result was that many car drivers had to wait quite a while at a railroad crossing till the driver had taken his fries to the train so as to continue his journey.
The police contacted the NS (Dutch Railways) and they said they would investigate. What happened with the driver since has not been revealed.


Broken cable. (own story, happened about 2 years back)
While driving between Arnhem and Utrecht in one of the new air conditioned double deckers (DD-IRM) we found ourselves in a bit of a mess.
A train before my train had broken down. This was only 30 min before Utrecht (the largest station in the Netherlands) and we where assured a train would come to pull it away quickly.
One hour later over the intercom, "Ladies and Gentlemen, there seems to have been a problem. We will be here for another hour at least. Those that are in a hurry to catch a plane or for exams can take busses waiting at station ***. This station is about a 10 min. walk in the driving direction of the train. We will continue the voyage soon."
For some reason I decided to stay in the train, after all it would leave soon, no? NO! Another hour later the announcement came, "Ladies and Gentlemen, it will take longer then expected. In an hour we will be going. The train before us cut the electricity wire overhead and it is being repaired. We will be passing out free drinks". Five minutes later: "Ladies and Gentlemen, since this is a doubledecker (two EMU's coupled together) the pasengers in set **** will not be served, our apologies". Guess in which train I was?
So, there we where. In a very hot train (no power = no airco and no opening windows) with nothing to eat and drink. So the passengers in our train set got together and started playing cards. What else can be done?
An hour later we saw the very friendly NS official. She joined with a few card games since she had nothing to do anyway but to wait.
Alright, at that time I had been in the train for 4 hours (total journey time normally 1/2 hour). The announcement came. Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls (when they say boys and girls you know something has gone seriously bad) We would like everyone to get of the train and walk to the train station just 10 minutes walking away. From there busses will await you to bring you to Utrecht. There you will get a drink on the house".
So we had to leave the train. Easier said then done. The doors would not open (you know, that electricity thingy) so we had to get out through the drivers cabin. That door is only 1,5/2 metres above the ground. No problem for me, but not everyone is in their prime. So we had to help stumbling elderly and mums with small kids.
We walked the ten minutes which, surprisingly, took 30 minutes. It seems that whenever there is an official delay announced by NS you can multiply it with 3.
At this very small station there was 1 (one) bus. The capacity of the bus was 40 seating and 20 odd standing. The train had a capacity of 300 odd, but was only filled with 100 odd. Math a la Enron would be involved in getting everyone to Utrecht. Another option would of course be another bus which arrived, NS style, 30 minutes later.
We drove the 30 minutes to Utrecht where we did not get a free drink. Figures.

All in all what would normally be a 1/2 hour trip took now 5 hours. Had a nice day, sorta.


Now you guys, write your your weirdest, funniest, stupidest story you can think of. It must have really happened!

iCe
09-10-2003, 11:34 PM
Wow! That's shocking.

The only trains I've ridden are Germany's DB and China's whatever-they-are-called.

I can see the Netherlands has a lot to learn from its soutern neighbour.

On my counless travels on the Deutsche Bahn, as far as I can remember, it was on time every single occasion. No-matter high-speed (ICE), long-distance (IC/EC/IR), or regional (RE, RB, S) trains, they were all bang on time!

petertenthije
09-11-2003, 03:47 PM
Well, it normally isn't that bad over here. Normally you can rely on them quite well, except for during the rush hour when everything goes tits up. Especially the capacity, a lot of trains drive around like sardine cans here during rush hours.

BTW, last time I checked Germany was still to the East of us, Belgium is to the South. But with Germany you can of course never be certain (I hope there are no Germans on the boards yet) :D

iCe
09-11-2003, 09:10 PM
I guess you're right...I just sorta keep an image of the world map in my head...so I know approximately where everything is...and it's not very accurate... :lol:

petertenthije
09-14-2003, 10:25 PM
Oh come on, someone must have a funny story! EGLL, you're from England, I know British Rail good enough to know you alone should be able to make this thread the longest ever (I've been in the UK for a year).

So start uploading some funny stories!


Some train announcements:
Translated from Dutch.
Ladies and gentlemen, our next station is Schiphol Airport, passengers with the destination Paris, London, New York, Berlin ... (continue 10 minutes!) ... please change here.

Also going to Schiphol Airport, the train official made an announcement that we where arriving at the airport in a few minutes. As is usual on this line the announcement was made in several languages. This guy was really good though! Not just 2 languages (Dutch & English) but 6! He ended with a Flemish announcement with a Flemish accent.
Allez, and now an announcement for our Belgian guests, we are now arriving at the station where the blue planes land.
BTW The Belgians from Flanders speak Flemish, which is just Dutch with a silly accent. And we Dutch like to make fun of them!

When driving of from a station the following private announcement was made: Would the kid that just crossed before the train please realise that you can be even more ugly! Must have been a close call to provoke such a announcement!

Announcement by the train catering: Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls here is your caterer speaking. Todays special is coffe with a pastry for Euro ##. Oh, by the way, we just got enough coffee for one cup. Now the train driver over the PA system: Mister caterer, I'll take that cup of coffee!. After which the train caterer went on the intercom again: It seems like I have run out of todays special.

Again the train caterer was making his announcement calling out his entire range of products. After 10 minutes the guy was finished. Now it was time for the driver to make his announcement: This is an announcement for the caterer, if you had bothered to look outside your cabin, you would have noticed the train is so crowded you can not get your car through the train. And for the travellers, next station....


English call outs made by Dutch train officials.
Arriving into Amsterdam, the last station for this train. Welcome at Amsterdam Central Station, please disembark as this train will be terminated! Sounds quite painful if you ask me!

We are now arriving at Schiphol plane station.

iCe
09-14-2003, 11:19 PM
Well once I was on a Deutsche Bahn regional train, and it seemed a child was announcing the stations. I suppose she was the driver's daughter or something like that, but anyways, translated into English it was somehting like:

(Ladies and Gentlemen, next stop is....uh....wait....what? ok, uhm, next stop is...oh my god...hahaha, hehehe, yea, next stop is Reutlin...I mean, Tuebeingen. Thank you, * more giggles *)

Thunder Down Under
10-05-2003, 07:09 AM
The black box on a diesel locomotive is a tape that records speed, braking, kilometres and a host of other information. This is a story of a tape inspection in the sixties.

An interstate express 44 Class diesel engine tape was read after complaints of rough riding. The tape of the second 44 was read, which was apparently seven miles an hour faster than the speedo reding of the lead engine.

The driver was asked for his defence for travelling at seven miles per hour over the speed. He reported that having checked his own record, The tape that the department was relying on was the second engine's tape. He was driving from the front engine; he couldn't see the speedo of the second engine.

He continued by saying that as the front engine was doing the correct speed and the second engine doing some seven miles per hour faster, it must have passed the front engine somewhere between Goulburn and Sydney although he had no recollection of it doing so!

By the time the front engine got to Central the second engine would have been in the Harbour! The driver applied for salvage rights of the second 44 class.

The driver was fined $10 for insolence!

:wink:

TDU

Gregory Wallace
10-05-2003, 07:51 AM
That's a very funny story, Thunder!! :lol:

Thunder Down Under
10-06-2003, 04:07 AM
That's a very funny story, Thunder!! :lol:

I've got a few more, will post them when time permits.

TDU